One morning, my coworker walked into the office with a short bob instead of her usual long ponytail. “Wow, I love your haircut,” I said. To my shock, she burst into tears. “I cut it to feel worthy of someone who didn’t even notice,” she whispered. Her name was Maris—kind, reliable, always smiling. I never guessed she was hurting. In the break room, she explained she’d been seeing a man for six months. Somewhere along the way, she began changing herself—how she dressed, how she wore her hair—hoping it would make him care more.
“He once said he liked short hair,” she said quietly. “So I remembered that.”
But when she showed up with the haircut, he didn’t even notice. What he did notice was his fantasy football team losing. A few weeks later, I went with her to a charity event for support. That’s where we saw him—with another woman. Later, he reached out to Maris, suddenly interested again. She read the message, smiled, and deleted it.
“I’m done shrinking myself,” she said. Not long after, she ran into him again and almost believed his excuses—but stopped herself. “I realized he never really saw me,” she told me. “You did.” Our friendship deepened. Slowly, she healed. One day, she surprised me by applying to a pastry course she’d always been afraid to try.
Then she asked me to dinner—not for comfort, but for something real. “I didn’t cut my hair for anyone this time,” she said. “You didn’t have to,” I replied. “You were already enough.” And that’s the truth she taught me: real love doesn’t ask you to change. It sees you as you are—and stays.