Having other partners while being in a committed relationship has always been controversial. Even though it’s not very common now, there’s a lot of interest in open relationships.
Our story today is about a woman who tried an open marriage and now regrets it. She wrote a letter sharing her story, asking for advice. Here’s her complicated story with an unexpected ending.
Eva has always been happy with her traditional marriage.
Eva, 35, shared her dramatic family story with us. She has mixed feelings about the situation and is still unsure about the decision she made after her marriage started to feel chaotic. Eva wants to hear honest opinions about her family conflict.
Eva started her letter, saying, “Hi! I’m in a very strange situation in my seemingly happy marriage. My husband Frank and I have been happily married for over 10 years. I always thought we had harmony, trust, and commitment, like any happy family.
I never thought about having side relationships that could harm my marriage. Frank has always been family-oriented and never gave me a reason to doubt his love or think he wanted another woman in his life.”
Eva continues, “After our second child was born, I gained weight due to a hormonal disorder. Frank saw that I felt insecure about my changing appearance and tried to reassure me that I looked great with my curves.
I finally accepted my new body when Frank surprised me one evening, hinting that he wanted more variety in his life. He said he loved me but felt the need for an ‘additional partner’ who looked different from me.”
“He hinted that he wanted to try a relationship with a skinny woman and suggested having an open relationship. This was a huge shock for me because I never thought about needing other partners. His hint about preferring a skinny woman felt hurtful, but I decided to ignore it.”
Frank and Eva began an open marriage, which led to a big family scandal.
Eva wrote, “One day, Frank said we should try an open marriage. I had many doubts, but after an honest conversation, I reluctantly agreed.
Frank quickly started dating other women, while I wasn’t looking for any partners. I tried to stay indifferent and kept myself busy with other things and hobbies.”
“One day, Frank shocked me by bringing one of his girlfriends to our house. He introduced her as Alyson and said she would live with us for 3-4 months because she had issues with her landlord and needed a place to stay until she found a suitable apartment.
I was stunned. At that moment, I knew I would divorce my husband because he had gone too far in his desire to be free from commitments. But I decided not to make a scene and planned my revenge instead.”
Eva taught her husband a lesson he will probably never forget.
Eva wrote, “As soon as Alyson, my husband’s new partner, made herself at home, she acted like she was the wife, and I was just a guest. I did all the housework while she relaxed and enjoyed my husband’s company.
One day, I stopped doing everything around the house. I only washed my dishes and my kid’s dishes, cleaned up after myself and my kid, and cooked only for us. Frank didn’t like this and noticed that I even stopped packing his lunches for work.
I completely stopped doing my wifely duties and started acting like a guest. One day, Frank said we needed to talk, and I was ready because I had something to say. I insisted that we talk in front of Alyson, since she was part of our family now. Frank was surprised but agreed.”
“Then, the three of us sat down, and Frank awkwardly said he was confused and frustrated by my behavior. He thought I liked the idea of an open marriage, but he was wrong. He complained that I was acting like a stranger, which made him depressed and annoyed. I listened to his complaints, then it was my turn to speak.
I calmly said, ‘My dear husband, I am also disappointed with this open marriage. You thought I liked the idea, but I hated it from the start. I only agreed for your sake, and I regret it deeply. Now that you ignored my needs and feelings, I’m not your wife anymore because you have another wife now, who lives in your house and must do all the chores for you.
She must share household duties with you, take care of you, and cook your lunches. She is part of your family, not mine, because I never wanted this. I want to ask Alyson if she’s happy knowing she’ll be doing your laundry, cleaning your bedroom, and solving your daily problems with you.’”
Eva wrote, “Alyson and Frank looked very upset by what I said. Neither of them expected this. Alyson stood up and left the room dramatically. Frank started apologizing, but I didn’t care anymore.
I took my things and moved out, and now I am going to divorce. Do you think I’m doing the right thing, or should I give my husband another chance?”